Confidence Coach: Have Your Own Back and Go After What You Want
You look like you've got it all together. Inside, you second-guess yourself, put off the hard conversation and wait to feel ready before the bold move.
Imagine just getting on with it. Making the decision. Charging what you're worth. Going after what you want, because you finally believe in yourself.
I'm Alex Rudnicka, a confidence coach for ambitious business owners and professionals. I help you build authentic confidence nobody can take away from you, because it comes from within.
Online, across the UK, Europe, the US and wherever in the world you are.
I built my confidence from scratch. So can you.
I was never a confident child. I grew up as an overweight kid full of self-doubt.
When I came to England, I had to make it work as going back to Poland just wasn't an option. Fear and insecurity drove me, and for years, it worked. As long as I worked for someone else. Working hard for a boss gave me what I was really after: proof that I was good enough.
Then I started working for myself. No boss. No praise. Nobody telling me I was doing well. Just me and my crippling self-doubt. I failed at four businesses. In hindsight, I can clearly see each one could have worked. I just didn't believe it would work for me.
In the middle of all that, around 14 years ago, I heard a podcast about how champions think. Rule number one: champions utilise their self-belief to their advantage, and they build it like a muscle. I burst into tears, because I realised I didn't believe in myself at all. That day I decided I would learn whatever was required to find out how to build my confidence.
Today, my confidence comes from within. A wobbly economy, a new government or a plan that falls apart can't touch it. Whatever happens, I know I'll figure it out and I'll be okay. That is priceless.
So here's my promise. Unless you came out of the womb confident (most of us didn't), confidence can be built. But true confidence has to be built from within. And once you have your own back, it pays off in every area of your life. Because wherever you go, you take yourself with you.
"But you're so confident": Tressa's story
Tressa runs a boutique agency for creative entrepreneurs. She's American, lives in Germany, and when we started working together her business was already doing well. Everyone told her how confident she was.
"People would say, 'But you're so confident.' I came across that way. But inside, I didn't really feel it. It was all a bit of a facade."
Inside, she kept asking herself: who am I to have this business? Who am I to have this team?
She was already making $10,000 a month. But in her head, she was still just a mum doing a bit of work at her kitchen table. The numbers never got through to her. Meanwhile she was undercharging, working 60+ hours a week and missing time with her two daughters.
On our first call, I told her she didn't need a business coach. Her business was fine and she was doing a fantastic job. What needed to change was her relationship with herself.
So we didn't touch her prices or her strategy. We worked on how she saw herself, until she saw a CEO looking back at her. Then everything else followed.
"I couldn't fix any of that until I truly believed I was worth enough to fix it."
What changed:
From $10,000 months to almost $50,000 months, on track for $500,000 this year
From 60+ hours a week to 35–40, with a team of 10–12 running the day-to-day
Speaking up for what she wants, at work and at home
"I can tie back almost all of the changes to our work together."
Tressa Beheim, Digital Agency Owner, Germany
What is confidence coaching?
Confidence coaching helps you believe in yourself enough to do what you already know you need and want to do. Make the decision. Have the conversation. Leave behind what no longer serves you. Go after the goal you keep putting off.
Most advice says fake it till you make it. Put on a brave face, stand tall, sound sure. But you know what's going on underneath. Faking it means pushing down the voice that says you're not enough and hoping nobody notices. It's exhausting, and it never lasts.
And what happens when things go wrong, as they inevitably will? A client walks away, the market turns, something completely outside your control hits. Fragile confidence shatters into pieces, because it was never real to begin with. Fragile confidence needs everything outside of you to go your way. Authentic confidence remains, even when circumstances get messy.
I've coached men in prison. The ones who worked hardest to look dangerous often felt the least safe inside.
You've probably met a milder version at work. The loudest person in the room, who turns out to be the most insecure. And the quiet one nobody pushes around, because they're completely at ease with themselves. People can sense the difference.
Real confidence is how comfortable you are being you. So we start where you are, with what you think, feel and do, and build from there. As the old stories about you fall away and you collect proof that you can trust yourself, confidence follows.
Self-confidence coaching: what we work on
Every client is different, but these five come up again and again.
Stop getting in your own way. Self-awareness and ownership: we identify every place you work against yourself, and you take full responsibility for your results. If you created it, you can change it. That's where your power comes back. And with me holding you accountable, the excuses run out fast.
Change the story you tell about yourself. Limiting beliefs, your self-talk and self-image: what you believe about you sets the limit on what you'll allow yourself to create. Your subconscious is always listening, so we change how you talk to yourself. Unshakable confidence doesn't come from beating yourself up but from finally being on your own side.
Release the past. Self-forgiveness: regret is a poor fuel for your next level. It eats up the energy you could be using to create with courage. So you let go of old shame and judgements, and start fresh.
Bounce back from anything. Self-compassion and resilience: you keep your high standards, and mistakes or rejection become information to learn from. They still sting. They just stop knocking you off course.
Become more decisive. Good decision-makers weren't born that way. They've just made a lot of decisions. Once you trust yourself to handle whatever comes next, you stop waiting for the perfect answer and start building that muscle, one call at a time.
Become your own permission slip
When we work on all of these, you change inside. You build a relationship with yourself that feels safe, so you can be at ease in any situation.
You make a mistake, take the lesson and move on. No beating yourself up required.
You fail, work out what to do better next time, and don't make it mean anything about you or what's possible for you.
And most importantly, you stop waiting for someone to give you permission. You get clear on what you want, and you go and get it.
Knowing this is the easy part. Living it when your stomach is in knots before the big call is where most people get stuck, and where coaching comes in.
She always had a very good reason not to go
Names and details changed.
A client in a senior leadership role wanted to build her professional network for future opportunities. She wanted to go to industry events and mingle with people far more advanced in their careers than her. Yet every time an event came up, she talked herself out of it.
"I'm too tired." "The kids need me." "I really should go to the gym."
Every reason sounded sensible. So we slowed right down and looked at what happened in her body when she pictured walking into that room. Underneath was a feeling she hadn't noticed: she felt inferior, as if she didn't belong with people more successful than her.
Once she saw it, she learned to feel it without letting it make her decisions. Then she started actually going to the networking events. She was surprised how down-to-earth those people were, and how keen they were to build connections with her.
Most people think they need a better strategy. Often it's the knot in your stomach, the fear of not belonging, that stops you doing what you already know you need to do.
Why work with a confidence coach?
Let me ask you something. How many books on confidence have you read? How many podcasts, posts and AI answers have you consumed? And what has actually changed?
Everyone loves the post about growth happening outside your comfort zone. How many posts like this have you got in your saved folder?
Coaching is for people who are ready to move from consuming self-improvement content to actually making real changes in their lives.
I'll be straight with you. You're capable. You've already built success in some areas of your life. Maybe you don't need a coach. You might want one, though, because people who get coached regularly follow through far more often. When someone holds you to your word, it gets much harder to back out.
The best athletes have coaches. So do I. I coach people for a living, and I have my own coach.
An extraordinary life takes extraordinary thinking, feeling and action. Most people will never hire a coach, and that's fine. This is for the ones who want more.
You already know what to do. The question is who's in your corner on the day you don't feel like doing it.
A special note to women
Nothing depletes your authentic confidence faster than what I call the "nice girl syndrome".
You say yes when you mean no, out of fear of disappointing people
You feel responsible for keeping everyone happy
You over-give to people who take advantage of your good nature
You over-apologise for things that don't require an apology
You still look for validation of your worth outside of yourself
You feel bad for people who don't treat you well, and maybe even explain away their behaviour
Setting boundaries makes you think you'll turn into a cold b*tch
One of your biggest fears, one you can't imagine surviving, is being called "selfish" or hearing "you've changed"
The "nice girl" pattern can and will block your next-level life.
It will damage your progress, and it will keep you from who you say you want to be.
So either you make a decision to transform this part of you, or it will continue to limit you.
This isn't for everyone. But if you feel it in your gut that it's for you, let me tell you: it IS one of the most important and liberating changes you could give your future.
As a recovered "nice girl" myself, I promise you'll still be you, warm and kind. Just free, and the most empowered version of yourself.
And when you're empowered, everyone around you benefits.
Except for those who used to benefit from your weak boundaries, that is.
And I happen to be world class at helping women transform this pattern.
Confidence coaching FAQs
I help you see exactly where you're holding yourself back, and then we change it, in your real life. We meet one-to-one regularly, you can message me between sessions, and I won't let you talk yourself out of what you want. Lovingly. But I won't.
Because you've got very good at looking the part. Most capable people have. You show up, deliver and smile, while inside you're thinking "who am I to be doing this?" Tressa's friends kept telling her how confident she was. Inside, she didn't feel it at all. Looking confident takes a lot of effort. Feeling it means changing how you see yourself. That's the work we do.
Yes. I'm a life and mindset coach, and confidence sits underneath almost everything my clients come to me for. Charging more. Leading a team. Finally making the bold move. When you change how you see yourself, it shows up everywhere: in your work, your relationships and how you treat yourself.
No. I coach women and men, business owners and ambitious professionals. Self-doubt doesn't care about your gender or your job title.
I'm not going to sell you "confidence in 30 days". That's marketing fluff, and you deserve better. We work on it until it's done, so the transformation is yours to keep. Some things will shift much faster than you expect. The stickier ones take longer. But think about it: you're undoing years, often decades, of stories about yourself. A few months is nothing next to that.
No client has ever told me "that took too long" without adding "And I wish I'd done it sooner."
More than any strategy I could give you. You can't charge what you're worth until you believe you're worth it. You can't go for the bigger role while part of you feels you don't belong there. Tressa went from $10,000 to almost $50,000 months, and we never talked strategy. We worked on her.
You tell me. You know the difference between a day when your confidence is at 1 out of 10 and a day when it's at 10. You can feel it. Now imagine taking that 10 into every meeting, every decision and every relationship, for the rest of your life. I'd call that priceless.
I'm probably not your coach if you want someone who nods along, or a weekly chat where you talk through your week and nothing changes. That can feel nice. It won't get you anywhere.
This work is for people ready to look honestly at how they think, feel and act, and how that shapes their results. You don't need to have it figured out. Being willing is enough, and I'll make it safe to look.
If you're in therapy, you're welcome too. I've worked alongside clients' therapists before: the deeper healing stays with your therapist, and with me you work on the areas you're ready to change. If you're struggling to get through the day or need to work through the past, a therapist is the right first step, and I'll happily point you there.
All my coaching is online. Whether you're in London, Manchester, Dubai, New York or anywhere else, we meet on Zoom, wherever you are.
Ready to back yourself?
Tell me in a few words what you want to change. I'll reply within 24 hours, and we'll set up a free initial conversation on Zoom.
Other ways I can help: Life and mindset coaching · Leadership coach · CEO coach · High performance coach · Imposter syndrome coach · Burnout coach